Turning 50 isn't what it used to be

CNN (?) did an article on Madonna turning 50.

I decided to read it because I was curious to see what sudden revelation was given because a celebrity was on the brink of becoming a senior citizen.

A part of me thinks.............so what.............My mom turned 50 eons ago, as did my dad.

Mom will be 70 next year and dad 66.

Yes, she married a youngin'.

But then I thought about this for a bit...fodder for the blog....and decided to create a positive spin on this entire spiel. Getting older appears to not hold the same bland stereotypes in my parent's generation.

A good thing in many aspects. (Especially with me turning 40 in about a month).

Older individuals are more health conscious (hmmm....must be the baby boomers motivation to change the status quo).

Older individuals are more active and living life to its fullest....as I plan to.

I enjoyed reading Carine Nadel's article regarding this topic and highlighted the points which mirror my own outlook:

Becoming a different age is like starting a new novel. With a book you open it up, hopefully get hooked on the first page and continue with enthusiasm until the very last word. With any luck you then realize it was so entertaining that whatever ills and problems that went on around you weren't enough to take away the excitement of the time spent reading. When you have finished with it, you get a brand new book and hope that it surpasses the last one in what you experienced. That it takes you to an entirely new level of realization that you did not think was possible. A birthday should be just the same. It should be the start of a new plot line. With any luck, the characters will be the same, but what happens to them and who joins in to make it more interesting will be full of surprises.
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No one likes to feel "old". Heck, who does? I am glad that venues such as the mainstream media, healthcare, and even yes fashion is catering to the older American set...gives hope to those of us who look forward to our golden years with serenity and style.

Goals and Youth

A very dear co-worker of mine was relaying about a friend she has (in her early 20's) whose life is spiraling out of control. I remember that age and feeling like I would conquer the world (yes even girls get that way also).

Maybe because I am older now I feel like I have to release some of my "inner-wisedom" to the younger generation. I can see clearly the path this friend of my co-worker's is taking and it isn't good.

When you are in your 20's it is understandable that you are coming into your own...you are "finding" yourself...what it means to be an adult. At the same time you have to be consciously aware of what you are doing, the path you are leading yourself down....don't make the mistake of letting years slip by without having some kind of formal plan in place.

Being in your 20's is the perfect time to start laying the foundations of your career, to come into your own...establishing a retirement plan...even if it means setting aside $10.00 a month (whatever you can afford) and place it into an account that will work for you.

If I could redo some of my 20's all over again I would...though I was in college by the age of 21 with 4 years of active duty Army under my belt and a 1 year old child...(I live life to the fullest)....I would most definitely have explored solid career options by attending community college first (as my own daughter is doing)...and delve into what career would suit me the best.....my dreams were to become a foreign service officer or at least serve in the Peace Corps...ended up becoming a non-commissioned officer (rank of sergeant) and serving in the Americorps-Vista program instead.

The point being...you take your lemons and make lemonade...if one door closes you go through the window.

To get back to why I wrote this post...I honestly hope my co-worker's friend wisens up, wakes up and realizes what a good thing she has to work at NARA and to be in college and to be in her 20's...with her entire life splayed out before her and to create her goals, follow them and make her own dreams come true.

The missing piece

Sometimes in life we are faced with very difficult decisions, whether it be dealing with an ailing parent, finding a new job, leaving a bad relationship, earning a promotion, kid(s) off to college...basically everything that life throws at us creates a new dimension of thought.

Currently am trying to seek a higher paying position in management, find a house, and get into better shape. Pretty lofty goals but goals I know I can attain. Reaching them means being organized, consistent, and focused. I cannot sit on my laurels and do nothing. God didn't build me that way. I am an individual who seeks higher attainment either physically, spiritually or financially but I am cognizant of my place in life--where I am going.....

Why do people fail to attain their dreams? Richard Koestner tackles this issue in his article: Reaching One's Personal Goals: A Motivational Perspective Focused on Autonomy which can be found in the February 2008 issue in Canadian Psychology:

People who are not reaching their goals: (a) ...lack clear, specific goals; (b) they fail to monitor their progress toward the goal; and (c) they do not possess sufficient self-regulatory strength to maintain goal pursuit in the face of obstacles and distractions.

By creating a conducive environment which clearly tackles these issues a person can easily attain what they are reaching for....write down your goals...see what mirrors your beliefs and passion for life. Analyze the obstacles which prevent you from attaining your dreams and write down how you can attempt to overcome them. If you do not have a support network that can help you achieve these goals--discover methods you are comfortable with to reach them. Create a positive environment so you can...by completing the missing pieces in life's puzzle, see the entire picture.

Catholic Singles Alumni Club

Interested in learning more about what the CSAC does? Had a question about the CSAC? Looking for free food this Sunday evening?

The Catholic Singles Alumni Club invites you to our General Meeting! We will have the General Meeting this Sunday, August 3rd from 5-7 PM at the Aquinas Institute of Theology (23 S Spring Ave; 63108 http://www.ai.edu ).

If you have any questions for the CSAC; please, bring them with you or email them in advance to Steve Valko at: valksr@yahoo.com

Learn more about the World Vision

Confessions of a Jellyfish: Self-criticism is often erroneous.

O Holy Ocean, Womb of Life,
God of the Bounding Main,
Hear this confession of my faults
And take away my stain.
You'll never put me on your list
Of saints and heroines,
Of creatures tough and
firm and sure --
Not me, I'm full of sins.
A Jellyfish! All gush and squish,
No sense of wrong or right,
First, one inch wide, then, with the tide
I grow huge overnight.
I have no backbone, and no guts,
No vigor of the will,
I vacillate with every wave,
Un-firm and volatile.
What's that? YOU LOVE ME AS I AM?
"A great transparent wonder?"
"Your tentacles all spark with strength?"
No, God! I'm just a blunder!
A gutless freak! A floating joke!
Not fish! Not made of Jelly!
YOU LOVE ME STILL?
Don't hate my shape?
Don't find me gross and smelly?
PRAISE GOD, ye ocean freaks and flukes,
Ye frightening creations!
The Love who made us loves us still,
Despite our reputations!
By: William Cleary, How the Wild Things Pray

http://www.archstl.org/laityandfamilylife

The CSAC is an organization dedicated to creating and maintaining an environment for its members that is conductive to the Development of productive social, cultural, civic and spiritual relationships in a Catholic setting.

Full membership is open to Catholics between the ages of 21 and 45 years of age who are eligible to marry in the Catholic Church. Friend of the CSAC memberships are available to anyone who doesn’t qualify for full membership. Dues for all members are $25 per year. The CSAC does not discriminate against anyone on the basis of race, creed or nationality. For those events where space is limited, preference will be given to members.

Passion verses Love verses Lust

Love - is the unconditional acceptance of all things as they are. To alter or expand them by contributing to them in a loving way creates blessings. To alter, judge or limit them by force or fear creates burdens which you must carry, experience or learn from. Lust - is wanting something that you can't have, taking something that isn't yours, (through acquisition, force, coercion or manipulation), and believing in something that isn't loving, (like domination, control)

I think people sometimes confuse lust with love. These are two separate emotions though when combined can create a lifetime of memories.

Love is when you trust and respect the person, you are not jealous of their outside interests....you trust them to do the right thing because they respect and value who and what you are....they would not do anything selfish to jeopardize the relationship.

Lust however is more of a primal intensity. It consumes the body and brain...may be mistaken for love but I feel they are two different entities. Though when in love I think lust can go a long way in keeping the relationship alive. It adds spice to the heart..emboldens the person to capture something from the other and stakes a claim. It becomes a passion...something that can be celebrated through a lifetime. Passion, love, lust...combines themselves into an enduring symbol of emotional achievement.

Lust is chemical reactions....a basic need...a genetic predisposition to perpetuate the human species. Love seems to be more of a higher cerebral function...

Love is transcendental, exalted and celebrated in poems, epics, and have caused great men to fall.

Lust appears to be the driving force behind the love between a man and a woman...propels the relationship forward...yet as we age....when lust wains does love? I say no...not when it's real. That is why I feel love is of a higher emotion in the hierarchy of all emotions. Lust may culminate into love. Love into lust. A symbiotic relationship which can co-exist in harmony with the right person.


Love means accepting that person as they are despite their faults...you work together to compromise when you don't see eye to eye. If it's lust the attraction of that person may fade. For lust is fickle and insecure. Love is constant and enduring.

I look at marriages today...many fail and wonder if people marry when in stages of lust...in a hurry to "get hitched" seemingly desperate to create their own inner sense of a fairytale only to find out later when times get tough that their partner does not measure up to what they think love should be.

For love always hopes.

For love always perseveres.

It rejoices in the truth and turns away evil....silly? I don't think so. Seems to me love is a trillion dollar industry with movies, books, candy, cards, weddings etc. and etc.

When I see an elderly couple walking hand in hand, content....for me that is lust/love----passion which has endured decades of hardships and causes me to yearn for a simple formula for this thing we call life.

Marital advice

I was reading my Prevention Mag regarding heart healing and marital discord.

According to Dr. Arthur Agatson, his article Married to Heart Health:

Spouses who reported a lot of negative encounters with their partner had blood pressure that was on average 5 points higher than that of single people. The emotional stress of a difficult marriage typically causes adrenaline levels in the blood to spike, raising blood pressure; it can also cause blood vessels to spasm. Worse, women who keep their feelings to themselves during arguments with their husband have a four times greater risk of dying than women who do not, according to findings reported in the journal Psychosomatic Medicine.

So obviously, the quality of your marriage is a key factor in determining whether your heart will benefit from it.

He discusses the benefits of couples being able to freely argue with one another without storing all their pent up emotions for fear of causing marital rift.

Talk therapy
Good communication is key to a vital, healthful marriage. John Gottman, PhD, executive director of the Relationship Research Institute in Seattle, recommends these strategies for managing conflict:

State your needs If you don't, you will end up blaming your partner (who is not a mind reader) for not meeting them.

Listen to your partner's concerns Get his perspective--empathy is essential to fostering greater intimacy.

Solve problems as they arise Stonewalling or avoiding conflict leads to simmering resentment, bitterness, and anger.

Learn to negotiate People's needs are always changing; good relationships require constant give-and-take.

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Good advice for anyone really and especially for couples who are having problems and communication has become a forgotten tool. They should face their problems instead of letting it all stew until either one or both individuals explode. I have seen couples bicker for the most insane issue(s)....for me it is a sign of a larger problem. The partner will nag over something so benign as taking the trash out when really the person is upset because the spouse is not fulfilling his or her full share in household chores/came in late/etc. and etc.

Being single has its benefits but for me at least if you find that individual you want to share your life with better to have a brightly lit road ahead of you than all these obstacles that make you want to simply give up.

Choices

On English Sabla we are currently having a discussion/argument regarding nursing homes in Oman.

I completely understand the cultures and mindset of people out there who frown upon such institutions because of what it secretly entails.....not being able to personally care for your parent at home.

Puerto Rico is similar in attitude. I had an aunt who passed away at the ripe age of 90. She suffered from dementia and her daughter cared for her at home. I can just imagine the stress and trauma placed upon the daughter to watch her mother deteriorate.

I find such places as nursing homes and the most recent development of adult day care centers as becoming essential for societies like the United States.

For myself, both options are a godsend and I do not see anything wrong with placing a loved one in a reputable home if it is the best thing for that family member....especially if certain medical needs must be met and the child cannot provide this at home.

Culture plays allot on how it influences elderly care.

I do understand why Hispanics and Arabs prefer to care for their parents at home. There is obligation, compassion, love and respect for this human being. My own mother never quite understood the concept of nursing homes....even to this day. God bless her....at 69 she is one feisty lady and I could not imagine placing her into one. She is vibrant, colorful, simply passionate about life and being a mother to us three children.

The forum posting caused me to pause and seriously think about my own aging parents and it begs the question of "what if."

Food for thought.

Capturing the Moment

I originally posted this on my other blog on March 22, 2008 which bears the same name as this one and wanted to re-post since it means so much to me:

Live life in the moment.

What does it mean to you?

It means a lot of different things such as venturing outside your comfort zone….and people have varying levels of that comfort I know.

What I might consider an adventure others might regard as unsafe…and yet some will take it a step further and feel that I am being far too conservative.

ME? Conservative? Maybe in some issues. not in all.

Living in the moment is capturing what it—LIFE–means to you…unique to each and every individual.

My life…..ahhhhh my life—–has been chalked full of many such moments…frozen in time as if laid upon a piece of faded Kodak paper.

I can still visualize the years slipping away taking me back to a time maybe forgotten once but somehow…something keeps bringing it all back.

Could be as simple as a song, as devine as a smell, perhaps a word or phrase someone passes along my way.

Anything…

And I think………….

I think…………………………

Why did I do that?

What was it for?

Did it change me?

Did it move me—-

---move me to the point where my chosen path in life changed because of that one captured moment?

Yes….yes God to so many things…….sometimes it feels like a rush of images, experiences, emotions…almost like watching an old 8mm movie reel of: “This is YOUR Life.”

And you bear witness to your triumphs, mistakes, glories, tears, love, laughter, pain, color, sounds, voices, regret, friendships, travels, sickness, creativity—deaths, goals met….goals lost——advice given and……not taken.

This is your life. Yours…to capture in your hands, heart, soul—to seek in doubt, faith, love-and in the end having the strength to sift through it all and claim what is yours, to acknowledge all that is there—capture all of it…all of it and realize….this is your life.

Why men love bitches

Okay........

Why do men love bitches?

(It was interesting reading but made me wonder also)

Now that I have your attention I decided to discuss a book I came across and read out of sheer curiosity.

I always am interested in hearing the opinion of the opposite gender when it comes to relationship issues.

In college there is a class called: The Psychology of Women...I didn't take it but heard it was always full. I digress but had to mention it....men are just as hard to figure out at times also fair is fair in love and war! ;^)

I always thought men prefered the girl next door type....this author discusses how women can have their cake and eat it too (and not share any unless they want to).

Good

Bad?

Depends on your point of view and what you consider a "bitch" to be.

Is she a confident woman or a pain in the the royal ass?

The author discusses some key points regarding how men and women interact in the dating scene and how women who are too nice tend to be used as doormats while women who are more assertive attract their errr prey.

From Publishers Weekly

Contending that some women are "too nice," comedian and radio show host Sherry Argov has written Why Men Love Bitches: From Doormat to Dreamgirl-A Woman's Guide to Holding Her Own in a Relationship. "I'm not recommending that a woman have an abrasive disposition," Argov writes, "The woman I'm describing is kind yet strong. She doesn't give up her life, and she won't chase a man." Her sassy book is filled with scenarios and advice aimed at making women subtly stronger and self-empowered. Argov's principles, which range from the farfetched to the downright absurd, include "If you give him a feeling of power, he'll want to protect you and he'll want to give you the world" and "A little distance combined with the appearance of self-control makes him nervous that he may be losing you." The book, which has already been featured on The View and The O'Reilly Factor, should make waves with its controversial view of relationships. Copyright 2002 Reed Business Information, Inc.

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Personally, I feel that there is no one true guide as to how to behave in a relationship...you go with your gut instinct always respect your partner as you should be respected in return...have common interests...laugh, laugh, and laugh...enjoy being together---it shouldn't be so hard.

BTW....don't miss out on reading Why Men Marry Bitches

Now I have really seen everthing!

A friend of mine told me about online divorce....and am thinking:

????????????

WTH?

Where has society come to that now you can get a quickie divorce online?

Wow man I mean what a bargain....of course being saracastic here!!!

Divorce doesn't have to be difficult (yeah right)

CompleteCase.com™ is North America's premier affordable divorce service center. Our simple and inexpensive process will enable you to complete your divorce documents from the comfort of your home, without incurring the cost of an attorney, or dealing with lengthy completion and delivery periods. The total cost is $249.00.

CompleteCase.com™ does not provide blank forms or divorce kits. You will receive completed documents, explanations and instructions. The documents are customized to the state or province you live in, your children, your income, your assets and other factors in your case.
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Seems like the coward's way out. WHAT in the WORLD has marriage and relationships come to?

Website:
http://www.completecase.com/
http://www.3stepdivorce.com/states/missouri.shtml?gclid=CLS87-bkyZQCFQKcFQodw2H-kw

Dealing with different personalities

Whether it be at home or work, sometimes it can be a mental strain having to be with people whose life perspective varies from your own.

I am a laid back individual....who is passionate about certain things in life. If I wasn't I would be a cold fish.

Anyway, I think about people I interact with on a daily basis--family, friends, colleagues and it makes me think about my daily interactions with these people.

My brother and sister are very different from myself. My sister is passionate I would say about 99.9% of anything she comes across with in life. My brother is the same and at times feels that he is 99.9% right about anything...I mean anything...it's all good...I tolerate these things in small doses.

At work I get along with everyone albeit one person on the team I personally chose never to communicate with because of her drastic views on life. Far too toxic.

So what are the main types of personalities?

Ever the ardent researcher I found this information (fun to read):
1 Reformer
I do everything the right way.
"produces order" (51/4524)
2 Helper
I must help others.
"humble goodness" (86/3746)
3 Motivator
I need to succeed.
"Succ-esssss" (74/2979)
4 Romantic
I am unique.
"tragedy queen" (341/8751) Type4 Board
5 Thinker
I need to understand the world.
"full of disclaimers" (263/8443) Type5 Board
6 Skeptic
I am affectionate and skeptical.
"fortress mentality" (70/3181)
7 Enthusiast
I am happy and open to new things.
"dizzy flirt" (87/3783)
8 Leader
I must be strong.
"I'm Stalin!" (70/2878)
9 Peacemaker
I am at peace.

I consider myself a combo of #5, #7 & #9....(btw Peacemaker is my family title also). ;^)

In regards to psychology and the realm of personality tests, I have taken the Four Tempermant Test numerous times in the past 10 years and always came out the same:

The Protector
As an INFJ, your primary mode of living is focused internally, where you take things in primarily via intuition. Your secondary mode is external, where you deal with things according to how you feel about them, or how they fit with your personal value system.
INFJs are gentle, caring, complex and highly intuitive individuals. Artistic and creative, they live in a world of hidden meanings and possibilities. Only one percent of the population has an INFJ Personality Type, making it the most rare of all the types.

INFJs place great importance on havings things orderly and systematic in their outer world. They put a lot of energy into identifying the best system for getting things done, and constantly define and re-define the priorities in their lives. On the other hand, INFJs operate within themselves on an intuitive basis which is entirely spontaneous. They know things intuitively, without being able to pinpoint why, and without detailed knowledge of the subject at hand. They are usually right, and they usually know it. Consequently, INFJs put a tremendous amount of faith into their instincts and intuitions. This is something of a conflict between the inner and outer worlds, and may result in the INFJ not being as organized as other Judging types tend to be. Or we may see some signs of disarray in an otherwise orderly tendency, such as a consistently messy desk.

INFJs have uncanny insight into people and situations. They get "feelings" about things and intuitively understand them. As an extreme example, some INFJs report experiences of a psychic nature, such as getting strong feelings about there being a problem with a loved one, and discovering later that they were in a car accident. This is the sort of thing that other types may scorn and scoff at, and the INFJ themself does not really understand their intuition at a level which can be verbalized. Consequently, most INFJs are protective of their inner selves, sharing only what they choose to share when they choose to share it. They are deep, complex individuals, who are quite private and typically difficult to understand. INFJs hold back part of themselves, and can be secretive.

Take it with a grain or salt or for entertainment....I read just for the sake of it.

Websites:
http://instantpersonalitytest.com/?SSAID=68http://www.businessballs.com/personalitystylesmodels.htm

http://www.personalitypage.com/four-temps.html
http://www.personalitypage.com/INFJ.html

Does being in a committed relationship make one boring?

Another, yes...interesting discussion the Sabla:

From Superbia:

I have noticed that some people really change once they’re committed, and their life only revolves around that significant other. I don’t know if it’s right or not, because friendship is a messed up thing, and so is relationships.

~Do you think that a person in love makes them less boring to their friends?

~If you’re committed, would you treat your friends differently, or lets say behave differently.. ?

~If you noticed your friend changing, what would you do about it?
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My thoughts:

I believe priorities do change once you are in a committed relationship because you start to focus upon different aspects of the new relationship that may not necessarily involve your group of friends....this commitment could be many things, a demanding job, marriage, having children, setting up house and such...these things may not be of interest to your single friends (and sometimes not so single) if they live a lifestyle that does not encompass these new factors.

Most of your free time may be spent with family such as children, your spouse--or even interests that doesn't include your circle of friends, and thus the times you do spend with them shrinks.

I believe that those individuals who rather spend more time partying it up rather than being "grown up" in their newfound commitment still have allot growing up to do.

Now don't get me wrong...we all need to have our time away from our significant other, our job, etc--that's natural and needed. Spending time with friends and having activities outside the core relationship is vital for it to survive.

Who says being committed has to be boring?

Finding a balance is the key.

Website:
http://www.englishsabla.com/forum/showthread.php?t=56488

Weddings

I'll never understand the tension and disharmony when it comes to planning a wedding....as my brother's special day draws near I can already see fraying around the edges with my dear family.

I would think (and hope) a happy occasion like this one should be received with grace, humor, and utmost civility...but at times people do some really crazy things as the impending date draws near.

Perhaps there is far too much focus on the details of getting the wedding "just right" and not enough upon what this blessed occasion is all about...forget for just a moment the flowers, the dresses, the groomsmen, bridesmaids and instead see the day as what it is mean to be:

A glorious union of two souls joined as one for the journey of a lifetime.

Laughter at work

Long days at the office can be tedious unless you have some comedians on your team and I sure do. I just had a good laugh (tears streaming from my eyes) when one of my co-workers relayed a story regarding some loose horses which came into her yard...mind you she lives in ever-lovin' redneck country. Just the way she described these horses and the attitude of her ritzy neighbor (who btw owns these babies) gave me a colorful glimpse into her country life. (Man....this woman really could have a novel written based on her escapades)....Sitting there listening to her jaunts had me rolling and made being at work today for 12 hours more stimulating..yeah I'm sad. ;^P

I never get tired of my team. Most of my mates keep me well motivated and jovial. I honestly think if you have great co-workers it makes for a better more healthy work environment.

Changes

I was reading Confessions of a Pioneer Woman's account of how her life has changed from big city to ranch living..reflecting upon where she is at currently. We are both the same age 39..ack ack....and like her I have reflected my own past....where I thought I would be at this age...where I have gone.

In my 20's I thought my life would be different...perhaps a "lifer" in the military. An officer and transferring my skills to a federal civilian position.

Of course things change....such is the nature of the beast but I can say I have lived a very fulfilling life. I was not one to simply stand by and allow life pass me by. It is far too precious to let it be so.

I gained a daughter, friends, an education, travels, and insight.

Who can ask for more?

The Generosity of Arabs & other rants

Prior to having Arab friends I didn't know much about them other than what I read in history books and saw in the movies....sometimes these perceptions can either be misleading or sadly pigeon holes people leaving no room to think outside the box.

Yes....leave your comfort zone and get to really know these people has human beings.

I initially met Arabs in college while attending the University of Southern Indiana. I was fascinated by them...well with the Middle East since a wee child.

And when pursuing my graduate studies I was surrounded by friends from all corners of the globe including the Persian Gulf and also Lebanon and Syria...a commonality between all of these people is their immense generosity...especially the Omanis who are well known in the Gulf for their giving nature.

Nine time out of ten if we went out they would always pay for my meal no matter how much I protested. Their dinners were elaborate and I could want for nothing. Their selfless nature in being a most gracious host is legendary....not just with myself but with anyone.

I feel that people really should attempt to delve outside of their comfort zone and get to know these Arabs....as individuals and not part of some kind of peculiar oddity....and not allow media to influence you into thinking all Muslims or Arabs are terrorists and Xenophobes. I have had the fortune to meet many Muslims and Arabs in college and knew in my personal life who break the stereotypes placed upon them by society.

Underneath it all...we are the same--same blood, heart, lungs, muscle, bones...human beings trying to make it on this planet we call Earth.

Weddings

I don't know why people freak out when a wedding approaches. I hear about frantic brides and grooms mentally trying to scrape it together so that they have the "perfect" wedding of their dreams...and with a 51% US divorce rate I think....hmmmm....is all that hoopla really necessary.

'Course is an individual thing and who knows maybe that 49% leftover will make it. We should always pray for the best in anything, especially a marriage. This day in age it seems more difficult for couples to walk down that blessed path.

My views on the American marriage though tend to be very grim. Only because I see so much drama going on. People divorce at a drop of a hat these days.

They don't want to work things out.

Why????

I would surmise an educated guess and think the lovely couple just don't have "the time" to work things out.

Sad.

I sometimes find it a blessing how I never married.

Came close.

But that is another story altogether.

I found out some stats regarding my high school graduating class and you guessed it..........

Over 50% of my classmates are divorced.

Sad.

Whatever happened to sticking together through the tough times.

Whoever said marriage was easy?

Does everything these days have to be resolved in a sitcom minute?

Apparently in this society it does!!!!!!!!!

4th of July

I am planning to visit a good friend of mine in Indiana for the holiday weekend. I pray that everything goes well as far as getting down there. I am exicted (SCREAAMMM) to just see her.

She and I talk allot via email...(I am better writing than speaking)....go figure....we think alike in so many ways.

Looking forward to some drinks, meeting her family again, swimming and just relaxing having a wonderful Midwestern get together.

I feel that the two of us have a wonderful connection and is someone I am most grateful to have in my life. I can vent to her about my own personal frustrations regarding my job, family, dating, and whatnot...she has shoulders that can carry the load of the world.

Get togethers like this are priceless and I for one am planning to enjoy every moment with her, her family, and friends.

Looking back

It is human nature to look back on one's accomplishments.....seeing where you came from....so that you know where you are headed.

Scary hmmm?

Yes and no...............

I find it hard to believe some of the events I've gone through in my life...from my stint in the Army, stationed overseas, visiting the Middle East, having a child, college...images, feelings, sensations, moments caught up in what it means to exist.

My existence....no one else can claim these experiences, thoughts, triumphs, defeats----but me.

I own these victories, losses...all of it.

Once I thought myself a victim of circumstance but slowly....slowly I am coming into my own...I think such thoughts develop wisdom....it isn't simply just knowledge but what you gained...what you take with you as you time travel through life.....to where your final destination leads you, me...all of us.

Living in the moment

When we were younger it seems our days stretched endlessly. We lived in the moment...come what may--we faced our fears, our joys, our triumphs head on.

As we age seems our hearts, or at least mine, can become dulled with so many varied experiences.

I want to recapture living in the moment...where I felt the thrill, excitement, rush of every single second of my life.

Enjoy each day in its fullest glory.

“We must not allow the clock and the calendar to blind us to the fact that each moment of life is a miracle and mystery.” H. G. Wells (1866 - 1946)

“Most of us think ourselves as standing wearily and helplessly at the center of a circle bristling with tasks, burdens, problems, annoyance, and responsibilities which are rushing in upon us. At every moment we have a dozen different things to do, a dozen problems to solve, a dozen strains to endure. We see ourselves as overdriven, overburdened, overtired. This is a common mental picture and it is totally false. No one of us, however crowded his life, has such an existence. What is the true picture of your life? Imagine that there is an hour glass on your desk. Connecting the bowl at the top with the bowl at the bottom is a tube so thin that only one grain of sand can pass through it at a time. That is the true picture of your life, even on a super busy day, The crowded hours come to you always one moment at a time. That is the only way they can come. The day may bring many tasks, many problems, strains, but invariably they come in single file. You want to gain emotional poise? Remember the hourglass, the grains of sand dropping one by one.” James Gordon Gilkey