Depending on a man

A question was posed on English Sabla regarding a woman being totally dependent on her husband for everything. Endure Whisper, one of the members has this to say:

I've been depending on my husband ever since I got married and I don't think there's anything wrong with that. I mean he has to take care of me even if I was working.. If I worked and made my own money, I would save everything I earn and still spend his money.. so I might as well just not work!I've noticed many girls wouldn't want to depend on their husband financially and want to make their own money... Reasons could be due to dignity or simply because they want to work!I need solid reasons from the girls who don't want to rely on their husbands financially.. Or men, if you have anything to say about this please go ahead

My response:

I am single and quite independent. I feel that if both are working then there should be an account where both provide for the upkeep of the home i.e. the mortgage, utilities etc....fair is fair. I want to be indepedent and feel if a woman is too dependent on her husband what happens if he divorces her or dies? My mom is totally dependent on my father. Was a stay at home mother, never worked outside the home, doesn't know how to drive. She knows if something happens to him she will need to rely on family for everything. I feel that a woman needs to be independent in some aspects because you never know what is around the corner.I don't think being independent is being pessimistic.

I left home at 17. That is me. There are many other Western women out there who like being the boss of their own money and lives. Some don't some do. It is shameful to look down on independent women. If they choose that route that is their business. Same as a woman who is dependent on a man...my only concern is if he doesn't provide for her if he divorces or dies then there lays a problem. My father for example, when he passes away will be leaving my mother in debt. He has not thought about her future. She will be solely living off of his social security and pension. Now, they owe on a mortgage...he doesn't have term life insurance so that when he dies the insurance pays off the mortgage.

So what happens...the house gets sold and anything left from the sale will pay of the remainder of the mortgage. He has no life insurance on himself or my mother. So what happens. His children will have to try and find the money to bury them. That is why it is so important to make sure all bases are covered when it comes to critical life issues. I know in some societies burial expenses are not a concern but I don't live in some societies. I live in the USA. It would be very unrealistic to apply what happens on one society to us since we have a population of over 300 million and where are the monies to bury the people who die every day?

If I lived in a country where the population is only say 2 million then funding can be more readidly provided by the government if they are capable of doing so.

What if you are married to a man who barely makes enough to sustain both of you? Is it really fair to have this burden totally upon his shoulders if the wife can also work? I find it very selfish if the woman stays at home while the man is busting his *** to provide for the both of them and they are barely making ends meet. If she decides to remain at home then I feel she cannot complain if he is working his *** off to meet the mortgage, grocery bills, etc....if he says it is ok for her to stay at home then that is that couple but if he really is working hard to make ends meet I think the wife needs to step up and help.This can be found in all societies not just Western mind you. I think it is totally unfair to lie all the financial responsibility on a man if the couple is struggling and the woman is healthy to work.

Website:
http://www.englishsabla.com/forum/showthread.php?t=54833